Family…

What is family? There are so many definitions of “family”.

fam·i·ly [fam-uh-lee, fam-lee]

1. parents and their children, considered as a group, whether dwelling together or not.
2. the children of one person or one couple collectively: We want a large family.
3. the spouse and children of one person: We’re taking the family on vacation next week.
4. any group of persons closely related by blood, as parents, children, uncles, aunts, and cousins: to marry into a socially prominent family.
5. all those persons considered as descendants of a common progenitor.
6. Chiefly British. approved lineage, esp. noble, titled, famous, or wealthy ancestry: young men of family.
7. a group of persons who form a household under one head, including parents, children, and servants.
8. a group of people who are generally not blood relations but who share common attitudes, interests, or goals and, frequently, live together: Many hippie communes of the sixties regarded themselves as families.

To most of Americans it means, a mother, a father and children, uncles, aunts, cousins, etc. Anything else is just unacceptable. You can not have 2 mothers, 2 fathers or any other combination… 2 mothers, 1 father. Why not? Sometimes we allow society to dictate what is right and wrong in our lives. Who has the right to dictate what makes up a family? What difference does it make to anyone outside the family?

This is something that has been bothering me lately. I grew up in a “straight” family… mother who abandoned us and father who was verbally, emotionally and physically abusive every single day of my childhood. I had a grandmother who stood by and allowed others in the blood family do and say anything they wanted to me no matter how much it hurt. I had/have aunts and uncles who couldn’t care less about what happened to me. I have 2 brothers who don’t give a damn about me or what happens to me unless they want something. I have a sister who barely knows I exist.

Family is people you can count on to be there for you when you need them. Family is people who stand by you and support you through difficult times and celebrate the good times. Family is people who share and give without expecting anything in return. Family is people who love you for who you are not for what you have. That is why these people are not my family and they never have been.

Family can be anyone who you would die for and who would die for you. Family are those you can count on to be by your side through the good times and the bad. Family are those who love you for you no matter what.

I am building my own family. It’s a non-traditional family and a little complicated to explain. I know few can understand or approve but really, that is their problem. I don’t live my life for them, I live it for me. I live it for MY family.

Live your life with love, surround yourself with loved ones regardless of your blood. Life is too short to live any other way.

~ by asinnerasaint on August 16, 2007.